Can We Talk? The Truth Between Us

For though I am free with respect to all, I have made myself a slave to all, so that I might win more of them. To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though I myself am not under the law) so that I might win those under the law. To those outside the law I became as one outside the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law) so that I might win those outside the law. To the weak I became weak, so that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that I might by all means save some. I do it all for the sake of the gospel, so that I may share in its blessings. (1 Cor. 9:19-23)

All things to all people. Sounds impossible. In fact, my google searches pulled up multiple quotes which said something like this: You can’t be all things to all people. So which is it?

Well, Paul isn’t exactly commanding us. Paul is testifying! He is inviting us to live a particular kind of life by telling us the importance of a particular way of life he is practicing. Paul is witnessing to the call of Christ in all our lives by sharing from his own life.

Become all things to all people that you might by all means save some. That is the basic message we should take from Paul. But what does it mean? Become all things…? Does that mean I should not be myself? Does it mean that I have to give up who I am? Does it mean I should forsake what I think is right to do something that someone else thinks I should do …even when it’s not right?

I hear those questions and I ask them myself quite often. And I feel pretty certain they are missing the point that Paul is trying to make.  Paul is talking about how we talk. He’s writing to Christians in Corinth who have all kinds of disagreements and cannot get along. And using his method of sharing the gospel as a model, he is trying to teach the Corinthians how to talk to one another. Paul’s testimony is that for the sake of the gospel, when you talk to another person you must become like that person.

As I get in to what Paul means, let me ask you a couple questions:

What’s your favorite TV show?
What day and time does it come on?

So whatever your answer was, here is what I know: with so many streaming services, TV shows come on anytime you want them.

The world has changed since I was growing up. (Am I really old enough to say that?!) You can get most anything you want anytime you want now. I remember turning on the Tv, finding nothing I wanted to see, and just settling for something that I didn’t like. But I watched it anyway and it made me think. Today, we turn on the tv and get exactly what we want. There is no settling for something else. And while that may seem great, it’s actually creating a huge problem.

With so many choices at our fingertips, we never have to engage things that we do not like or agree with. If that sounds innocent, let me remind you that Jesus spent most of his time around people who believed things he didn’t agree with, who taught things he did not support, and who lived in ways at odds with what he taught – the Pharisees, the sadducees, the tax collectors, prostitutes, Gentiles, and ALL sorts of people who were different from him.

You see, when you only spend time listening to people, places and things that you like, that you support, that you agree with, you end up creating a bubble around yourself. A bubble that insulates you from the rest of the world. A bubble that looks like you, thinks like you, and lives like you.

We call this bubble an Echo chamber.

We unknowingly create these bubbles – these echo chambers – for ourselves. You see, we humans tend to interact more with people who echo our beliefs. We like what they say, so we spend more time around them. In contrast, when we do not like what someone says, we tend to stay away from them. The result is that everything we see and hear and experience is just an echo of what we already think about the world.

These echoes reinforce and underwrite what you already know. You become isolated and insulated. Your thinking becomes narrow and closed. Nothing challenges your perspective. Nothing invites you to see things you have never seen before. Nothing pushes you to step in the shoes of another person who has a different experience of the world. Instead, you live in ideological echo chambers.

Echo chambers are not healthy. They insulate us from different ideas and experiences out there in the world that are critical to discovering truth.

You ever met someone who watches a different TV show than you. And they go on and on about how great it is. But you are completely lost because your TV watching bubble does not include that show. How do you talk about a show you haven’t seen? Do you just blow the person off because they are crazy to like THAT show? Or does it make you want to go watch that show so you have something to talk about? Maybe the truth is this: that show IS the best and you just don’t know it cause you haven’t seen it.

This is why Paul wants us to become all things to all people. To help us get to the truth. You see, when you are stuck in an echo chamber and you try to talk to someone who is stuck in a different echo chamber, it won’t go well!  YOU WILL FAIL!

Just watch a presidential debate! It’s always two people talking in echo chamber. Neither can see the world from the perspective of the other. They don’t even really respond the the points the other makes. They just try to bash one another for the win.

But before we go on, hear me say this: None of us are to blame for these echo chambers we are caught up in. We don’t even really realize we are creating them. And the truth is the world is just fueling them right now more than ever. But here’s the thing: simple because these echo chambers exist, we must take personal responsibility for them. That is, you and I must become responsible for intentionally listening to different perspectives and faithfully engaging the different ideas within those perspectives to learn and grow from them.

This is how we come closer and closer to the truth – about God, about the world, about issues in the world, about everything!

How so? Well, you ever heard the saying, The truth is somewhere in the middle. That is how so. Let me explain in two ways:

First, anyone with kids knows you cannot get the truth from two children who are disagreeing by listening to one or the other. You have to listen to both. And then look for the truth between what each of them is saying. They each have an element of the truth. But they are each usually missing something important as well. And we are all just like those kids! The truth is between us!

Is what you have seen important? Yes, of course!

Is what you have not seen equally important? Yes, of course!

You know what you have seen. And that determines what you think and see and understand in the world. But what you think is not necessarily the truth. Because there are a great number of things you have not seen in the world – situations you have never experienced. Lives you have never lived. Struggles you do not know. And those experiences and struggles bring light to the truth every bit as much as your experiences.

What you have not seen may change the way you see and understand any subject or issue in the world. And as what you haven’t seen informs what you have seen, you come closer to the truth.  And when you come closer to the truth, you become exponentially more effective at communicating and conversing with other people.

Paul knew this and that’s why he testified to the power of becoming all things to all people. You do that by listening to their perspective, by learning their language, by stepping in their shoes and experiencing the world from their set of circumstances.

That’s what Paul did when he shared the gospel with people. When sharing with Jews, he became a Jew that he might understand what is was to be a Jew and experience the world as a Jew so that he could better talk to Jews. This is the model for conversation that Paul gives us.

Become all things to all people so that you…

1. Learn, grow, experience more of the world, and come closer to truth, and
2. Meet people where they are in conversation

Think about it this way: If you are going to be a full time missionary in a foreign land, what is the first thing you would need to do?

You have to learn the language of the people who live there, right? You cannot expect to talk to someone about Christ if you cannot speak their language. If try to talk to them in your own language, you will fail. To faithfully and effectively communicate to someone who speaks a different language, you have to learn to speak their language. Learning someone else’s language is perhaps the most missional and Christ-like thing we can do

We need to apply this to every conversation we have with every other person in the world. You want to talk to an atheist about God, well you better learn how atheists think and what makes them tick and how they talk so that you can be effective with them. You want to talk to a scientist about music, well you better learn how scientists think in order to better communicate the aesthetics of music. Guys you want to talk to your spouse, well you better learn how your spouse thinks and what makes him/her tick or you will be sleeping on the sofa!

So here is the lesson: You and I must bear the cross of stepping in to another person’s world. You do not love someone by demanding that they be like you. And you cannot love someone without seeking to understand their point of view. But when you take up the cross that Paul and Jesus testify to, when you step into another’s shoes another’s world and learn to speak their language and see the world through their eyes, then you come to understand the person better. You begin to discover how best to speak to him or her. And believe it or not, you will begin see how much common ground you have. And that is when you become effective, that is when you begin to find the truth.

So, let’s take personal responsibility for the echo chambers the world is building around us. Go get started. Learn to be all things to all people. Step in someone’s shoes. Listen. Work to understand a different perspective than your own. It may or may not change your overall view, but by doing this you will learn how to talk, how to better converse, and your life will look a lot more like Jesus.